Nutters

LIfe is a bit weird, you're rolling along, just minding your own business, that's enough really I have no time to mind anybody else's business, and then things happen that make you stop and well that's it, just Stop.

That's the dog we adopted last year, wearing an underwear turban. Burleigh has no shame. He can wear underwear any way he likes. He chews sticks, water bowls and he carries the chooks (chickens) around in his mouth every once in a while just to freak them out. We don't have a picture of that, we don't want the PETA people to find out.

Things happen.

Haiti, horrible earthquakes and the days that follow, make me slow down just a wee bit and take a moment.

Then one of your students is riding his bike to Maccas to buy a cheeseburger with his mate, and an accident happens, his mate falls off his bike, hits his head and is lifeflighted to the BIG Smoke to the hospital there. YOur student is in shock, he called 911, he did the right thing, and still he feels an overwhelming sense of guilt. His mates dad had told them "be careful." as they were leaving the house. They were, they did everything right, but his mate is on a ventilator with severe memory loss, he can't get past it.

So I stop. I stop being cranky with my boys when they can't find their soccer uniforms. I stop getting cross with my daughter for forgetting to take her soccer boots to the tournament. They are kids and I am thankful to have them. They are half grown. They will leave home. They will still probably forget things. However, they are Mine.

Dislike.

what do you do?

the person who is supposed to love all kids

   in a position to reach out to youth from differing backgrounds, to draw them in, be kind and show them love...

so what do you do when

                                     they don't like your kid.

You can tell, by the way they talk, how they call you and tell you every little thing your child has done wrong, how they ask your child to be quiet over all others who are talking, at each opportunity.  

                                            What do you do?

you cry.   

do you encourage your kid to keep going regardless?  

                                i am just not sure that you do.

Guilty. as. Charged.

We had a beautiful day ... note here....

and here ...

created and loved a new lunch recipe ...yummy fish fried rice

                           walked the dog till he dropped here....

AND THEN.

I go and ruin it by worrying and being grumpy about Things, schmings, grrrrings, things.  Instead of recalling the day of blissful wild abandon, I fret and grump and grizzle, and ruin the bedtime.  So guilt weighs heavy, as IT Should, foul little wench I became.

            I WILL say SORRY.

I will ask Forgiveness and forgetfulness.

     

                                            I will try new cookie recipe and organic egg dye treats with the natives THIS wEEk.

No more mad, no more sad.  Time to move along skippy.

Risotto

Just a few things to be thankful for...  

The hope of firewood.

Being asked to be a Special Olympics coach.

House.

A car that has done 100,000+ and will keep on ticking.....

3 healthy, happy, well read children.

Soccer.

Piano.

Friends who flirt.

Text.

Family who want us to bring pies for Thanksgiving and tell us straight up which ones so there is no guessing and all are happy and full.

Living close to a library.

No tv during the week.

Sharpies.

Flannelette sheets.

Friends who drive past your house on rubbish day, notice your bin is NOT out and fix that up for you.

The warmth of autumn wrapped up in a creamy dish.

Wanting.

There are so many things I want. And it's not material things. Ok, maybe some of the things are material things. Frames to put photos in, thirty of them, so the hallway isn't so bloody white. Drives me insane. A vacuum that actually sucks instead of my Kirby circa 1950. A job, with health insurance and a bi-monthly paycheck. Chooks that actually stay IN the chook pen. Time to make some anzac biscuits. A bloke to put together the lovely garden table I was given. Or alternately to find that blooming spanner so I could put the damn table together myself. At least ten games of spades with my nutty kids. Non offensive words to say when someone asks if I like the delivery guy they sent me. I did not, he was so nice, probably I should like that guy, the nice one, but I don't, I prefer scruffy and just a wee bit of "you just don't know". The list goes on and on.

The wanting continues. So I wash clothes and write my assignments, and work and work. And try not to go nutso, because crazy is one thing, but nutso that involves stright jackets and padded rooms and heavy regulated meds.

Where is the fun in that?

THis week I'll work at a paid job for 43 hrs.

Study for 12-14 hrs.

Attend soccer training for my peeps 8hrs.

Attend the piano lesson 30 mins.

Cook 6 hrs or less if I'm lucky.

Pack 20 lunches.

Wash 10 loads of laundry, with at least 12 pairs of soccer socks.

Apply for 4 jobs.

Make 5 pennies magically cover $100 worth of expenses.

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1315753316/bclid1437076151/bctid1432781806

And listening to fun new tunes all the way.

Only Half

Leave It to Beaver we are not.

Our family is more train wreck in nature. Divorce. Abuse. Drugs. Poverty. Childhood is a thing we survived, my sister and I.

My brothers 17 and 13 years my junior, had the Leave It to Beaver lifestyle. Two parents who treasure them, and tell them so on a regular basis. A hippie/yuppie of a father and a precious balanced woman for a mother, mature before the arrival of their children. Always a nice house to live in, pantrys full of food, the latest toys, money for the sports they wanted to play. An international childhood. It makes sense then why they do not understand where we girls come from.

They have no concept of what we lived, it was not even in the same section of the library, they relaxed over in the private reference, while we were backlogged, in a bin out the back. Books in dire need of repair.

I do not mind, I have thrived. My sister crazy as she is, has survived in her own way, occassionally at the expense of those around her. Witnessing selfish behavior all through her childhood, it should not be surprising.

We know the whole story of their childhood, it is no shocker they are attending university, one in undergrad and the other in graduate school. They have only looked at a sliver of our lives. Until they do. We love them.

You can't caste stones until you read the whole book, look further than your earliest memory, choose to find out why your oldest sister acts crazy, there are reasons.

THey are only half brothers, until then.